From the moment I met Annie in the gym, I had a feeling she loved Jesus.
God placed Annie in my path during a time when I was on a mission. I was in my first semester of seminary, and my professor challenged our class to examine gaps in our local churches and to pray about how we could fill them with the gifts and abilities God had given us.
“Find a problem, then solve it,” my professor instructed.
I dove in enthusiastically. This seminary assignment felt like my chance to shine a giant flashlight on a problem, without realizing I needed to shine it on myself.
Armed with conviction, I was ready to schedule meetings with church leaders to call out older generations of women in our congregation not taking their Titus 2 responsibilities seriously. For years, I had longed for wisdom from women who could speak life into my faith, marriage, and motherhood, yet I often walked away from my searches feeling disappointed.
What I couldn’t see at the time was how narrow my expectations had become and how God was already answering my longing in a way I never would have planned.
Annie and I became fast friends, talking before and after gym classes about everything under the sun. Her bright brown eyes, gentle demeanor, and joyful smile became something I looked forward to seeing each day, and after a few weeks, she shared what I had expected—she loved Jesus!
As the months went by, I learned she was a few years younger than me and recently engaged. During a quiet morning sitting on my sofa, I sensed the Lord prompting my heart with these simple instructions: “Mentor Annie.”
Are you kidding? I thought. Didn’t God know my assignment was to point my finger at the older women in our church? Didn’t God know the problem and solution my professor had challenged me to find was them?
The prompting persisted as God continued to place Annie on my heart. After spending time in prayer, I finally mustered up the courage to approach Annie after class one day.
“Hey, Annie! Can I ask you something weird?”
Great start, Mandy. Great start.
“This may sound a little strange since we’ve only known each other for a few months, but I feel like God placed it on my heart to mentor you. Nothing fancy or formal—just an older friend who can give you faith-filled wisdom if you need some.”
I felt like I had just asked her on a date as I stood in the heavy silence between the ask and her answer.
Annie’s eyes filled with tears. “Yes,” she said immediately.
Annie shared that she is one of only a few believers in her family, and her fiancé is the only believer in his family. She shared that they have never had intimate examples of what it looks like to follow Jesus as adults, let alone as a married couple. The tears soon began to form in my eyes.
It all made sense.
The answer to finding meaningful mentorship didn’t lie in pointing my finger at the older women in church. The answer to finding meaningful mentorship began with looking inward, recognizing that the first step started with me.
In Paul’s letter to Titus, Paul gave instructions on how Christian women could embody God’s grace to a world in desperate need. Older women are to be “reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled” (Titus 2:3–5).
The word “older” doesn’t mean you have to be in your nineties to teach and train up the next generation. A high school student is older than a middle school student. A woman in her late twenties is older than a woman in college. A woman in her thirties is older than a woman in her twenties. “Older” is a relative term.
Paul’s point wasn’t age—it was responsibility. He urged Christian women to live out their God-given callings and bring younger women along with them, reaching back with open arms to share what they’ve learned. There is no age limit on being a Titus 2 woman. If there are women in your church who are a step or two behind you in life, you are the perfect person to offer friendship, pour out wisdom, and encourage them to live a life worthy of the calling on their lives.
If you feel unqualified to guide a younger sister in Christ, may I gently challenge and encourage you? Think again. We all have a role to play in the household of faith, and I know you have something incredible to offer to another sister.
Each generation carries unique wisdom that they can share with the next. God isn’t asking you for perfection. He’s asking you for participation.
Annie and I are close friends now, and when we get to meet outside of the gym, we talk about faith, marriage, family, kids, and more. In between our in-person visits, we light up each other’s phones as we check in with each other, offer mutual words of encouragement, and share prayer requests.
Not only am I a safe space for Annie; she is now a safe space for me. All along, I thought God would use me to mentor her, and although that may be true, what I’ve realized is that she pours into me too. What started as a soft nudge from the Holy Spirit to have a conversation with someone has now turned into a sacred, life-giving friendship.
The whole time I thought my assignment was to “think big” by calling out the masses. But God, in His kindness, placed an individual opportunity for discipleship right in front of me.
I felt as if Scripture came to life right before my eyes as God opened a door for me to put my faith into action—not through pointing my finger at others, but by looking inward, then choosing obedience in a way I never anticipated. I’ve learned that discipleship doesn’t require a certain age or brightly lit stage; discipleship requires a surrendered heart and open arms. The quality of our discipleship is not measured by the number of eyes that are on us; the quality of our discipleship is measured by who our eyes are fixed on. Discipleship is partnering with Jesus to steward the people and relationships He places right in front of us, one at a time.
Friend, the heart of Titus 2 is to live connected, to sharpen and encourage each other, and to link arms with the next generation of women. Look around you. Who is younger? Who is one step behind you in life? Who can you specifically encourage with your life experiences? Is there an individual opportunity for discipleship right in front of you that you can lean into?
I pray God reveals “Annies” to you, and that you are brave enough to say yes. You never know how God might use you to shape a life, or how He may use their life to shape yours.
Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank You for blessing us with godly community, especially our sisters in Christ. I pray You reveal women in our lives whom we can pour into. Fill us with courage as we reach out and back to the women You place in our lives, and give us wisdom and discernment to know how to steward our discipleship opportunities. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
